Not your average OOO message
This will be my last blog post until July 22nd.
Even just five years ago, I never thought I would type words like these. Taking a long break from this blog—or taking a long break from work in general—wasn’t really in my vocabulary.
This weekend marks the start of a three-week vacation with my family for our yearly summer trip. We’re spending one week in Mexico and two in Greece. I couldn't be more excited to make summer memories with the people I love most.
This commitment to taking extensive time off in the summer began three years ago.
I’d reached a point where I realized I wasn’t happy with the amount of time I was getting with my family. I felt like I was prioritizing work over them, and I worried that one day, I would regret doing that.
I wasn’t the only person who felt this way: At the time, I was traveling so much. My husband, Spiros, was excited for my success and always encouraged me to go for it, but neither of us could deny how much time we were spending apart. We missed each other, and we worried that we would become disconnected.
So, I promised myself and my family that, in addition to reducing my travel throughout the year (I now aim to spend at least 70% of the time at home, with some exceptions for busy seasons), I would take off several weeks every summer so that we could travel and have adventures as a family. And every year since then, I’ve kept my promise.
Now, three years in, I realize just how precious these summer breaks are. It’s rare that we get to spend so much uninterrupted time together at once. My husband, Spiros, is a surgeon who is on call a lot; I travel a lot for work, as you know; and our daughter lives in another state. The three of us get to spend time together every other week, but summertime is our only chance to have consecutive weeks together. It’s huge.
It’s also been huge for me personally. These breaks have helped me realize that I need a break. I know it’s obvious, but we are only human, and humans aren’t meant to be on 24/7. Sometimes, I forget that about myself. But when you love what you do and your work is so closely connected to your identity, it can be really hard to turn it off. These summer breaks have held me accountable to giving myself significant time off to unplug, creatively recharge, and remember the other parts of life that matter to me so much.
I realize now that I never want to be a leader who models a 24/7 working style. I want to take breaks, and I want to be loud about taking those breaks. Not only do I want to model that for my team and give them permission to take time off, but also, I want to model it for you.
But can I be really honest?
It’s not easy.
I fear judgment. I fear that people might think I’m not as committed to my work if I take so much time off. I fear that the business will slow down. I fear that our revenue will drop. I fear that my team won’t have enough to work on while I’m away. I fear that our clients might think that they aren’t a priority to me, especially those whose events take place right after I get back. I fear that protecting this time every year and saying “no” to events that coincide with my time off might make someone not want to reach out to me again in the future. I fear missing opportunities. I fear that taking a break from this blog might make you lose interest in reading it and being part of our community. I fear that you might think I’m not reliable or committed to showing up for you.
I fear all of it.
I mean, just look at this blog post. Why do I even feel the need to tell you I’m taking time off? I suppose I could just . . . disappear for a while without an announcement. What a radical idea. But in our 24/7 world, that’s not the norm. Not many people talk about taking breaks. You see people either leaving one foot in their work so that they’re not fully “off” or taking time off in secret. All so that, from the outside, it doesn’t look like they’ve missed a beat.
Or, I suppose, you see people doing what I’m doing: making a formal announcement to let everyone know we are taking a break—as if we need some kind of permission.
So, yes, I’m feeling some fear about taking so much time off. But what’s getting me through it is that I know how much of a positive ripple effect taking a break will have for me.
Aside from the most important benefit—time and memories with my family—I know that my breaks make me a better person. When I come back from a break (and especially a long one), I am unstoppable. I have so much energy, I feel so recharged, and I feel so inspired to do my work better than I’ve ever done it. It feels like my spirit has been renewed. I come back feeling so connected to myself, and I’m able to think and communicate with so much more clarity. I’m more intentional, thoughtful, and purposeful. I’m able to better hold space for my clients in our sessions. I’m a better, more patient listener. I come back with a glow and smile in my eyes.
You know that feeling, don’t you? If that’s what happens when we truly take breaks, then why aren’t we speaking up about taking them? Why do we act like we don’t need them when we desperately need them to be at our best?
While we’re on this topic, let’s talk about how to take a break that actually recharges you. I’ve certainly had those breaks where you come back feeling like you need a vacation from your vacation, and I’m sure you have, too. So how do we avoid that?
In the past, I wasn't thoughtful about my breaks. I didn't think about what I needed from them, and I often thought a break meant I had to go somewhere and make every moment count. If I was traveling with others, I’d go along with what they wanted to do, even if it wasn’t exactly what I wanted to do. And when I did that, I’d come back feeling the opposite of refreshed: I’d feel exhausted, depleted, and stressed. That was the energy that would follow me back to work.
Instead of just taking a break, give yourself permission to take the kind of break you actually need and advocate for that. What do you need from your break the most? Is it rest? Is it adventure? Is it solo time? Is it connection and time with friends or family?
I’ve spent some of my best time off in staycation mode. In fact, last summer, I spent part of our family summer block at home, and it was wonderful.
This summer, I’m craving adventure. I want to travel and make memories in new places. But the one thing I don’t want to do? Make decisions.
I make tons of decisions every single day. I’m decision-ed out. So much so that when we first started talking about this trip, the mere thought of planning it overwhelmed and exhausted me.
. . . and yet, what did I find myself doing the minute we decided we were going to Mexico and Greece? I started taking control of the decisions. I went into planning mode because it’s what I’m used to.
Thank goodness for my husband. He called me out. He could tell that I was stressed out and that I wasn’t enjoying it. And even worse, my stress was making things really unpleasant for my family. He suggested that he and my sister—who is also going with us on this trip—handle all of the planning on their own instead. They’re both really great at it, and my husband lived in Greece, so he knows the area.
It was the biggest gift and a reminder for me to make sure that this break is actually recharging for me. I was still able to speak up about the things I really cared about, like which islands we’ll be visiting and where we’re staying, and they supported that.
Case in point: There was one island they kept talking about that I just wasn’t feeling. It's not that there’s anything wrong with this island; it’s absolutely beautiful. It’s just that, the more I looked into it, the less excited I was to go there.
I thought about the ways I could handle it. I could have just gone with it, and I was tempted to do that, especially because I wasn’t planning the trip. But I knew that when I got to that island, I wouldn’t be as excited. And because this time is precious, I want to be excited. I want our vacation to be a positive experience for all of us.
So instead of going with it, I spoke up and asked if we could find somewhere else to go that we’re all equally excited about. We ended up choosing an island that we are all even more jazzed about visiting, and I predict it will be my favorite island of the trip.
The point is that if something that is supposed to help us feel recharged and bring joy starts to feel stressful or unfun, that might be a sign that we need to stop and ask ourselves if we are doing what we truly want to do. And if not, let’s speak up about it and make a change.
I hope you are planning to take a break this summer. I hope you’ll be loud about it. And I hope you’ll consider the thoughts I’ve shared in this blog to ensure that your break is exactly what you need it to be.
I’m proud to say my team is also taking a break. We have our company-wide Break Week during the week of June 30th, and some of our team will be taking additional time off beyond that. I couldn’t be happier for them.
This stuff isn’t easy. I block my time off a year in advance, and dang, is it hard to keep it blocked. I always get exciting speaking requests and opportunities that happen over the same dates, and sometimes, it takes everything I have to say no. But ultimately, I remember my promise to my family and to myself. I remember how taking a break helps me become a person who has even more to give. And that, to me, is so worth it.
So, before I sign off here for a few weeks, I want to ask you: What do you think about this post? How well are you doing at protecting time for you and your loved ones? Have you ever needed a vacation from your vacation? How do you ensure you are getting exactly what you need from your precious break? Hit “reply” and tell me all about it.
And thank you. Thank you for always supporting me. Whenever I’ve announced taking time off in the past, so many of you have written in with support, and I want you to know it’s helped me overcome a lot of my fears about taking breaks. It means the world to me.
HAPPY SUMMER! And bon voyage!
I’ll see you back here on July 22nd. I can’t wait.
Big hugs,
