What choosing a paint color taught me about leadership
My new office in our new house!
My husband and I are moving into our new house this month. It’s a historic home—it’s more than 100 years old—and we’ve been remodeling it for almost two years. It’s the first home we've designed together, and I am so incredibly excited to move in and begin this next chapter in our lives!
While I’ve enjoyed the process of remodeling a home, I quickly learned that it’s not my strength. I get overwhelmed by all of the potential choices. My husband, on the other hand, is so good at it and has led the way in choosing the style and direction of our home.
For the most part, our decisions have come together fairly easily (thanks to him!). But there was one room that proved to be very difficult: our home office. Knowing that I would be the one spending the most time there, I wanted to choose the paint color. But when it came time to make a decision, I got really stuck.
When I first started looking at options, I thought about my brand. The colors I’ve chosen to represent myself and my work are really bright and colorful (just look at my website), and because my office will be my background for many virtual speaking engagements and meetings, I thought it would make sense for it to echo that light and bright feeling.
But then, I thought about the actual purpose of my office. It’s not just the place I’ll be giving speeches and doing my day-to-day work; I envision writing my next book (and lots of books after that) in this office, and I want it to be a place that really inspires me and helps me connect to my creativity. When I think about the kinds of places that inspire me the most, what comes to mind are rooms that use dark colors and are really cozy, almost like an old-fashioned study. I’ve done some of my best writing and had some of my most creative ideas in dark and moody hotel lobbies and ski lodges.
I found myself torn between painting my office white and having a ton of bright and colorful furniture that matched my brand or going with something dark and moody—the total opposite of my brand.
I asked so many people what they thought I should do. I asked our architect. I consulted our interior designer. I brought the topic into dinner conversations with friends. Surprisingly, there was consensus: They all agreed I should paint it white and then decorate with colorful books, furniture, and art.
So that’s what I chose: We painted the room white.
But then, the first time I walked into my office after it was freshly painted, I didn’t feel inspired or excited. I felt bummed. It didn’t feel like what I really wanted deep down. I didn’t want to cause extra work for anyone—or incur the added expense of repainting the room—so I told myself to suck it up and hoped that maybe the feeling would eventually go away.
It didn’t. Every time I walked into my office during the renovation process, I felt that same bummed feeling. Deep down, I wished I had followed my gut and painted it dark.
I shared my dilemma with Monique, our Chief of Growth. Lucky for me, Monique has a gift and an eye for design, and she also has a degree in it! Monique started helping us in the early phases of our renovation and then took some time off to go on parental leave and welcome her newest baby into the world.
Now that Monique was back and helping us again, I told her about the office and how I wished I had gone with my vision of a dark study. The first thing she said was, “Well, what are you waiting for? Let's do it!” My husband also graciously supported that choice.
So we repainted it—and it was an expensive lesson for me. And I don’t say that lightly: I know that I'm coming from a place of privilege. I know that I’m lucky to be able to have an at-home office in the first place, and even luckier that I have the freedom and resources to paint it any color that I'd like. But even with that freedom and privilege, I still made a choice that didn’t feel authentic to me because I put too much weight on my image and what other people thought instead of connecting with what I really wanted.
Monique helped me see that two things can be true at once: My personal brand can be bright and fun, and I can also have a dark and moody office. What’s most important is that I follow my authenticity. If I spend all this time creating a space that ultimately doesn’t serve me, then it’s probably not serving anyone . . . right?
Asking for other opinions can be helpful when we’re making a big decision. But at the end of the day, what’s even more helpful is giving ourselves the permission to express ourselves in the way that we want to.
I know you don’t read this blog for design tips (thank goodness), so that brings me to the leadership lesson here: As leaders, I think we might feel pressure to represent ourselves in a certain way. I think we can get caught up in imagining what other people will think about our choices, and it causes us to get disconnected from what we think about our choices. In reality, I bet you no one really cares if my office matches my brand or not. I bet the same is true for something in your own life that you might be struggling to make a decision about.
What I've learned from this experience is to break the “rules,” give yourself permission to be YOU, and follow what inspires you. There is no better feeling than knowing you are following your authenticity.
I hope this post reminds you that I'm human, too, and I’m still learning all the lessons that I share with you here. Here’s to more learning and more growth . . . and a dark and moody office!
Big hugs,
