How I revamped our stay interviews
When’s the last time you took a close look at the habits and routines you’ve developed as a leader?
It can be easy to slip into autopilot once you get in a groove with leadership. But when you take the time to ask yourself questions like, is this still working? Is there a better way to do it? When’s the last time we tried a different approach? The answers can help you see whether these things still serve you or if they need to evolve.
I did this recently with an annual routine that’s really important and meaningful to our team: our stay interviews. I want to use it as an example to show you what I mean.
A “stay interview” is basically the opposite of an exit interview. I don’t remember where I first learned the term, but the concept comes from the fact that leaders often wait to ask people what they think we could improve on until they’re on their way out the door. The purpose of a stay interview is to get ahead of issues that lead to people feeling so unhappy and unfulfilled in their jobs that they want to leave.
Of course, even with stay interviews, people can still want to leave, and that's okay. But it feels much better to get these things out in the open when you can do something about them.
At least once a year, I do a stay interview with each person on my team where I ask them two questions: What needs to stay the same in order for you to continue to be happy and fulfilled here? What needs to change in order for you to be happy and fulfilled here?
I used to ask them these questions in a voice message, and then after each person sent me their answers, we’d have a conversation about what they shared. I liked doing it that way so that people could take as much time as they needed to think before they sent a reply.
That’s been my approach for years now, and there’s really nothing wrong with it. The conversations have always gone well, and my team has appreciated the flexibility and extra time to think.
But I’m trying to get in the habit of stopping to look at everything I do on a regular basis. When it came time to ask my questions this year, instead of just doing it, I asked myself: Is there a way to evolve this so that it serves us even better?
My answer, of course, was yes. I thought of several ways I wanted to switch things up that I’m really excited about! Here’s how I decided to evolve our stay interviews (which will have already happened by the time you read this!):
The questions I asked:
Instead of sticking to those two questions, I decided to ask several more questions that could lead to more thought-provoking discussions and bring things to the surface that may not naturally come up.
Here they are, divided into categories:
Fulfillment + Role:
On a scale of 1–10, how energized and fulfilled do you feel in your role right now? What’s contributing most to that score? If you could change one thing about your role/responsibilities, what would it be?
When was the last time you felt genuinely proud of something you worked on here? What made that task/project meaningful for you? How can we create more opportunities like that?
Growth:
Where do you most want to grow personally or professionally? What would a truly great year look like for you? How can I support you/challenge you to get there?
Tensions/Blind Spots:
What’s a tension point you’ve noticed in the business that hasn’t been addressed? Where, if anywhere, do you think we are avoiding hard conversations?
Compensation:
How are you feeling about your compensation and our current financial structure?
If you could wave a magic wand and change anything about how we do compensation overall, what would you change?
Feedback for Me:
Do you feel like I trust you? Why or why not? Are there any areas where you feel second-guessed/constrained/like I’m not allowing you to use your superpowers to the fullest?
What is one thing I do that helps you do your best work? What’s one thing I do that makes your work more frustrating? Where can I grow most as a leader for YOU specifically?
Looking Ahead:
What is something you hope never changes about our company/team? What do you think must change in order for you to stay engaged and fulfilled here?
Anything else we didn’t cover?
The platform we used:
Next, I thought about how we have these conversations. In the past, it’s worked well for the team to have time to process their thoughts before sending them to me and for me to process their feedback before responding.
But I wanted to see if talking things over in real time would make a difference. I decided to block off two and a half hours to meet with each person over Zoom so that we wouldn’t be rushed. I knew that by doing it in real time, there might be pieces that we’d need to process and revisit afterward, but with the level of depth of my questions, this format felt the most meaningful.
The amount of time I gave my team to reflect:
I still wanted to give my team time to think about their feedback, so I sent them the questions two weeks ahead of time. With all the new questions especially, I wanted them to have plenty of time to reflect.
The way I showed up:
I’ve always come into these conversations with an open mind and a listening ear, but this time, I wanted to encourage myself to also show up with extra curiosity. I grounded myself in the idea that this is my team’s time to speak and share, and it’s my time to ask questions and try to get to a deeper level of understanding. That also led to another goal I set for myself: to hear feedback without rushing to find a solution. I wanted to take more of a long-term approach to addressing any feedback my team brought up and to come back to the table with a well-thought-out solution instead of a quick Band-Aid fix.
As I write this, I’ve already had one stay interview, and the changes I’ve made led to a more intentional and impactful discussion. I’m looking forward to the remaining two interviews I have, and I think the team is looking forward to them, too!
I hope this serves as a reminder to check in on the things you do on a routine basis. Even if they’re going well, there’s a good chance you can make a few tweaks and make them even more effective. Give something a fresh spin or look at it from a new perspective, and see what you learn from it.
So now, here are some questions for you: What stood out to you the most in this post? Are you inspired to bring something new to your organization, or maybe to check in on an old system or routine? Tell us about it! Hit “reply.” My team and I love reading your reflections!
You’ve got this!
Big hugs,
